Fun With Privacy

The Internet’s been grumbling about Google consolidating its various privacy policies into one, and a couple of funny privacy matters shook out of the whole affair.


A search engine called Skipity has the worst (yet funniest) privacy policy ever. It’s a riot to read — so you should do that, — but to summarize: it starts out with legal nonsense, then goes on to say they don’t think you really care about privacy and that they will use whatever information they can get about you, if it can turn them a profit. You also grant them permission to insert a microchip in your body, use your secrets, watch you through your webcam and lie to you. If they get a chance to sell your data, they “will jump at that opportunity like a pitbull on a fresh steak.” Paragraph 8 reiterates that it’s not a joke:

8. We are serious about all of the above. So don’t go trying to sue us later with some nonsense like ‘I thought that was all satire.’ All your privacy are belong to us. We mean it.

They also disclose that they like chocolate chip cookies and bacon. It may be the only honest privacy policy on web, and a brilliant publicity stunt.


The Guessing Game

An Ars Technica writer tweeted about a Google page she found where you can see in what gender and age-bracket demographic Google thinks you belong. (Apparently Google is trying out for a job at the carnival.) Slate did an informal poll around their office and found it was mostly wrong: it guessed 4 out of 16 people’s demographics completely right, but thought a bunch of women were men, that people in their 30s were twice as old, and had no guess at all for three people. Slate also adds that besides Google’s guess, you can also see what other companies think of you: BlueKaiAOL AdvertisingBizoLotameYahoo, and Exelate. You may be thinking that you’ve never even heard of most of those, but they have certainly heard of you. The good news is that most of them give you the ability to opt out of from them tracking your every move.


And finally, a couple of years ago, The Onion had a very funny and relevant article called Google Responds To Privacy Concerns With Unsettlingly Specific Apology.

From SkipitySlate, and The Onion via Slashdot, Forbes and Neatorama


  1. Why Privacy From Government Is Necessary For Everyone | Apt46 - pingback on June 19, 2012 at 6:47 pm

Trackbacks and Pingbacks: