We’re Not Young

Amazingly hilarious parody of Fun’s We Are Young, by Yahoo!’s SketchY comedy team.

Full lyrics:

Give me a second I —

I don’t have time it’s getting late

My friends are all parents now

Dinner parties with cheeseplates

My girlfriend she is waiting for me

To buy a diamond ring

Been together eight years now

Feel like I’m settling

You know that college was ten years ago

I know you’re trying to forget

Depression and anxiety

Has come on strong since 33

Has made it hard not to crack

So if by the time I’m 40, I’m still a waiter here,

I’m killing myself…

 

Tonight!

We’re not young

We’re all somewhere in our 30s

And nothing worthy

This ain’t fun

 

Tonight,

We’re not young

I guess that I’ll learn Photoshop

Maybe I’ll sell pot

Start a blog

 

Now I know that I’m fat

Shut up about that

I guess I’ll do elliptical

Maybe I can finally do that yoga class

But I probably won’t

HDTV —

Gonna stay at home and watch Modern Family

 

Tonight,

We’re not young

Gonna get our shit together

Be less distracted

Words With Friends

 

Tonight,

We’re not young

It’s time to get my prostate checked

I’m a nervous wreck

That’s not all

 

Apply to grad school tonight

Yoga teacher training tonight

Real estate test tonight

Improv class tonight

 

We just need a word. I heard “pineapple”. PINEAPPLE! “Ugh, 4$ for a pineapple: can you believe this thing?” “You think you have it tough? Try raising this baby!”

 

Might have a drinking problem

I got a DUI

So someone come and drive me home tonight

 

I need health insurance

I got a dental sty

And I’m really gonna start that blog

 

Tonight,

We are scared

So let’s… just…. uh…

OH MY GOD!

 

Tonight,

We’re not young

We’ve accomplished almost nothing

I have no money

Where’s my gun?

 

So if by the time I’m 40

And I’m still a waiter here

Oh please God, I don’t even wanna imagine it

Tonight

 

 

And finally, the We Are Young song and lyrics:

 

From YouTube and Yahoo!, via Neatorama

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